The Trials of Acceptance: The Teacher's Perspective

The Teacher's Perspective:

Upon entering any given school, everyone will be able to identify the groups or cliques that roam the halls. The first group that always gets noticed just so happens to be the group that everyone seems to want to be a part of; the "popular group." When you look at this group, you see beauty, intellect, athleticism, and enough personality to fill up a room. It's always difficult to remember that this is what is seen on the outside and that every single person you meet is running an uphill battle to figure out who they are as a person, and what that means to them.

There are many times where I see my students struggling to "fit in." I always tend to reach out to them and make them feel comforted. It's difficult for me to imagine what goes on outside of my classroom. Are there any other teachers or adults who care as much as I do? Who else is helping these kids feel secure with who they are as individuals? Those are very hard questions to answer. Many students today feel alone and insecure because of how dominant social media has become, and how much it influences their lives. I can't tell you enough how much it breaks my heart to see middle school and high school students bully one another inside and outside of school just for fun, or to kick another student while they're down. (Read Jodi's post about our workshops in June from Youth to Youth this past summer)

It's hard to watch the struggle of adolescent acceptance because I just want to hug each student and tell them that "this will pass. Talk to me. Talk to any adult. Seek advice. Don't listen to the negativity. You are not alone. Join a club or sports team. Do something to help you figure out who you are and where your passions will take you in life." So many things to say, but it's about finding a way for each student to listen. If you know any teacher, you know that getting your students to even listen to a lesson or lecture is hard enough. One-on-one conversations with your students and their personal lives teeters along the line of personal space and boundaries. It definitely is a hard line to stay clear of when all you want to do is help. Trust me, it's even hard for adults to feel accepted every once in a while, and it is usually brought on by the presence of fear. Yep. You've read correctly. Fear. Adults are scared of fitting in too! It's usually for something silly like having to work with someone outside of our friend circle and stepping out of our comfort zone. WAIT. That's how YOU feel too, isn't it?

Wanna know the trick to getting over this hurdle and actually fitting in? Actually stepping out of your comfort zone, making new friends, learning new ideas and sharing your thoughts and experiences. It works. That, I can promise you. Hey, if I haven't said it enough, join Youth to Youth (or any leadership group in your community)! Go to the summer conferences, and change the world. You'll be able to find people just like yourself, and you will change your life for the better. Trust me, I know. I was once a shy kid in middle school and I went to one Youth to Youth mini conference and BAM, I became the amazing person that I am today. Okay, maybe that took years of practice and jumping out of my shell, going to the Eastern States conferences every year, joining Youth Staff and making some of the best friends I could ever have. Wanna know a secret? Even as an adult, those friends I've made at conference are on Adult Staff and we, as a collective, are super cool. Yep, I said it. COOL.

Anyway, for those of you that know me, I love to talk. I tend to get off topic, and I tend to say a lot in a short amount of time. Hey, that's the beauty of free writing. Is it not? haha :) My students understand this struggle of mine, but just know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE in your struggle of becoming who you are. Who you are is beautiful. Don't feel afraid to talk to your teachers/trusted adults about finding ways to get involved. Join Affirmative Fusion. HELLOOOO that's super important! E-mail Jodi, Lil Dee and myself with your qeustions, comments and stories. We'll get back to you as soon as we can. If it's very important, indicate that in the subject line. Also check us out on Instagram and Twitter! affirmative.fusion@gmail.com 

Any of you want to write from the student's perspective? E-mail us!

As always, be positive. Be aware. Be you.

Brit

Live! Peer Pressure (starts at 7pm)

So, you've been in school for about a month or so now and you've seen some people already acting differently than they did before. They are being talked into doing things they wouldn't normally do on their own. They are changing who they are in order to fit in with a new group of friends. Heck, it might be you and you are worried and don't know how to continue to be yourself and keep your new friends.

Tonight, we will look at two videos that we can talk about or you can ask us questions about what to do with your situation. Brit, Jodi and Lil' Dee are here for you and are ready to chat -- we hope you are too!

Below you can check out the videos (after the videos is a chat area, you can log in or just come as a guest and talk anonymously):

Video #1: Peer Pressure -- Adolescent Issues

Video #2: 

Instructions to chat:
To sign in: you can sign up for a chatroll account (it's free!) at chatroll.com, you can sign in using a Facebook account or a Twitter account. If you want to remain anonymous, then you can just click the Guest button at the bottom of the Chat Area and enter your own username that has no ties to you.

Chat Area #1 (up to 10 people) We will add another area as needed through the discussion. 

Chat Software

After the chat:

Please take our quick evaluation survey, so we can know how to better our discussions for next month!

Videos for Tonight's Discussion

Here are the videos that we are going to discuss tonight for our Live! Peer Pressure chat. Check them out now, or during the discussion --it's up to you.

Talk to you all soon!!

Video #1: Peer Pressure - Adolescent Issues

Video #2: How to Deal: Peer Pressure

Peer Pressure Information (Check out before our discussion on September 27 @ 7pm!)

Peer Pressure Information Sheet

supplied by Affirmative Fusion

According to a publication on peer pressure by Parent Further, only 10 percent of teenagers surveyed said that they had not been influenced by peer pressure. In that same group, 28 percent of teenagers agreed that giving into peer pressure improved their social standing and nearly half of those surveyed admitted to picking on someone only after a friend picked on that person.

Peer pressure and drugs:

• According to the Underage Research Drinking Initiative, two-thirds of 10th graders and two-fifths of 8th graders have tried alcohol.

• The Monitoring the Future Survey from the same initiative found that approximately 30 percent of 8th graders have used illicit drugs.
• The survey also made three conclusions about the effect of peer pressure on drug and alcohol use:
• Teens with friends who do drugs and drink alcohol are more likely to do the same.
• Teens who do drugs and drink alcohol are more likely to convince their friends to do it too.
• Teens who do drugs and drink alcohol are more likely to seek out other teens who do the same.

Peer pressure and Sex:

• As teenagers try to find their identity and acceptable roles, they also face pressure to give into their new sexual desires. A study from the Kaiser Family Foundation found that:

• One-third of teenage males feel pressure from their friends to have sex
• 23 percent of females feel pressure from their friends to have sex
• 44 percent of teens want more information on how to handle pressure to have sex and how to know when they are ready to have sex.
• 46 percent of parents have not discussed with their teens how to handle pressure to have sex

Positive Peer pressure:

• Not all peer pressure is bad peer pressure. Organizations such as the American Red Cross, use peer educators to teach teenagers about safe sex because they have found that teens are more likely to listen to positive messages when they come from those in their age group.

• The NAIS (National Association of Independent Schools) suggests having older teens who do not use drugs or alcohol to talk to middle schoolers to help influence them to make positive choices.

September's Online Discussion: Peer Pressure

Who: Everyone!

When: Sunday, September 27, 2015 

Time: 7:00 pm

What: Online Discussion about Peer Pressure

More information to come!

Back to School and more...

Hello all!

We know that it's been a long, crazy summer and are sorry we have not updated the blog since June! We were at the Youth to Youth International Conference (Columbus, OH) in June and then the Youth to Youth Eastern States Conference (Smithfield, RI) in July/August. We had a blast getting to know you all and hope to see you on here more regularly now that school is back in session!

Affirmative Fusion knows that going back to school can be tough or exciting. It can be tough due to pressure from peers to go down the wrong path and not do something you think is right. It can be exciting because after a long 3 months away from friends, you are back together.

This month (September) we are going to have an open discussion on Peer Pressure and how one can deal with it in a positive way. We hope to provide you with resources to use to help you make this positive choices and to give you a safe place to voice your opinions and pleas for help. We are here for you throughout the school year and beyond. Check back weekly for updates on different ways Peer Pressure can appear throughout the school year and the tips to help you stay on your path. We will also let you know when a live discussion with Brit, Jodi and Dee will take place (more on that later!).

Good luck this year and we hope to see you back!

Youth to Youth International

We wanted to thank all of you who are visiting us after our workshop at Youth to Youth International Conference 2015! We loved talking with you about bullying, cyber bullying, social media awareness, and being the positive you. We encourage you to look around the website and to follow us on Twitter (@affirmfusion) and on Instagram (@affirmative.fusion).

We are still in the process of putting everything together on here so on our social media apps is where most of our stuff will be; however, come back often and check us out! We will let you know when there will be live discussions on various topics and we will being adding more ways for you all to connect with each other and others who may need support in their lives.

Be positive. Be aware. Be you.